Creeping cold death gripping my body
With dead fingers in a vengeful hold

*My favorite part. This was such an intense piece. I felt so sad after reading it. I know that things like thi shappen to people everyday and they really don't know how to bounce back or recover. Drugs are almost like cutting. I don't do drugs but I do cut and I know how both can ruin your life. I know you're a strong young man and that you'll make the right choices. Anyways I really enjoyed this piece. One thing I would do is edit the first part becasue there's some weird thing there and also I would get rid of the capatilized words. You have so many and they are unneeded. Other than that a very emotional piece. Thanks for sharing it with us. *huggles* Love ya hun. Nik*

Very dark, insightful and expressive poem. Well written. Ending was superb, beautiful and very poetic.

Such a wonderful imagery of how taking drugs would truly feel. I've never tried or wanted to before and this makes my decision all the easier because it feels such a dark and depressing way to be in. Lovely description though, well written. 5/5, Em

I love this from start to finish and can relate to every part of it. as ^ there said, very dark, depressing and very very insightful to some people. you have a great way of expressing yourself to others, well done angel.

~Amanda

"I came to a party to have a good time
I was greeted by some powdered lines.
"Who wants a go?" I was asked
I stepped up and walked to the table.
Sniffing my share my nose felt like it burned
I walked to the bathroom looked it the mirror
As I watched the world twist and turn."

Hmm. Interesting start. It sort of reminds me of Alice in Wonderland.

"Needing one more line to make it through
I gave in to my weakness and made it two.
Rolling a note in my fingers ready to feel my rush
Placed my note in my nose and sniffed the powder.
I had crushed I steadied myself trying to see clear
The effect had come and gone and was replaced by primal fear."

So I take it you were doing a drug. Hmm. Nice imagery.

"Creeping cold death gripping my body
With dead fingers in a vengeful hold
Breaking my body and chilling my soul.
Feeling my body shake the ground silently
Dying slowly not making a sound.
The gears of my mind grinding to a halt
Staring into oblivion resetting to default."

"Creeping cold death gripping my body
With dead fingers in a vengeful hold
Breaking my body and chilling my soul." I love this part. The words were chosen perfectly, and it flows nicely. This is my favorite stanza, your description is amazing.

"Wishing so badly I did not start
I wanted to have a good time
I had to suffer for my art."

Interesting way to end it. It was just simple, yet effective. I liked it.

Nice poem, Luke. 5.5
I hope you're doing well, Keep Writing,
Erna

I love it!!..its just like a wild ride that all of a sudden tries to come to a sudden stop..i love the way its worded..♥

I like the moral. It seems these days we are all suffering for our art.
I hope you are well.