I believe in God,
That is why I try doing good,
Forcing myself,
Even when not in the mood,
Though I stumble,
I always endeavor not to be proud,
Pride that hurts the spirit.
I smile often,
Ever grinning to soften,
Hardy hears of emotions,
Weary faces of frown,
Drowned, withdrawn, and joy so torn,
I try to share love,
True love that is rarely gotten,
I try never to dishearten.
I live life to achieve,
Offer to the world,
Whatever I am meant to give,
Sometimes I get hurt and grieve,
Cry, curse, regret being alive,
But I always thrive and forgive,
Ensuring I do not dwell on the negative,
The best way to achieve relief.
I sin,
When I act, pray and think,
Struggling to fight and win,
Duels that have no life meaning,
I feel brought down and trampled upon,
Beaten by my own human nature,
But I take it all in,
Pull up myself and hope again.
I try.
I like my patience,
The peace I gain from silence,
I enjoy loneliness hence,
But I get lost in self conscience,
That which hurts my persistence,
As out of myself I try to make sense,
Only to halt at the difference,
Between my life and existence,
I want to see through life's lenses.
I am not righteous,
I love to think I am generous,
But pleasing to all? Not always,
Sometimes in fact I am envious,
I do not condemn myself for this,
I am not that pious,
I may leave that to the philosophers,
Since I am not a genius,
Just trying to be cautious,
All I yearn for,
To be conscious.
All my friends I appreciate,
Thank God you all came my way
By fate,
All the good you do to me I replicate,
I try at my enemies not to hate,
I meditate upon everyone day and night,
Albeit uneasy to pull off I admit,
But that I exist is a fact,
And by doing this is I live,
I do not doubt, I trust.
I feel sad,
I have been disappointed,
Disoriented and rejected,
Accused and misjudged,
My pleas going unheard,
My tears of innocence unseen,
But I emerge again from the rain dry,
For he brings courage I always yearned,
Faith that I have always wanted,
Joy that I have ever hoped for,
I am happy.