I will survive this, or die trying.

Last night I went a bit crazy.

I cut my regular wrist
I cut my good wrist
I cut my stomach
I cut my hip
I wanted to cut my throat.

I wanted to die.

I can't depend on people anymore, I need to deal with everything myself.

People come and people go, most people that do come end up going.

People suck and they leave.

All that's left is you, alone and waiting for someone to care but nobody ever comes.

I want to live, I want to make a difference, I want to help people, I want to be there for them no matter what.

Before I do this though, I need to make a change in myself, I need to stop all this self harming crap.

If I want to be of help to anyone, I need to learn to help myself, I need to learn to handle things the proper way.

So now comes the hardest part, I must get rid of the sharp things.

Say goodbye to the blades, say goodbye to the pocketknife, say goodbye to everything sharp.

Say hello to step one, say hello to the rubber bands.

Goodbye visible self-harm,

Hello freedom from my self inflicted wounds.

Hello freedom from all that binds me.

Hello life.