The Winds of Winter

Hey there fellow poet:)

I think some words could be left out or changed to make it an even more strong poem. I will put the ones that could be omitted or added in brackets so you can see what I mean.

Loved the poem, by the way..very strong in meaning and presentation!

Intrepid [these] winds [that] swirling through the listless night,
On white marble clouds[ that] coalescing in silence[,]
[carrying] a certain malice,
Surging forward from the deep ocean far[,]
[These] winds in the cold gloom[,]
No deliverance they send, nor compassion[,]
Just[ the] grey looming vapors of the coming Winter
Gathering from afar,
A stark panorama in exhausting frames of vision,
I stand beneath their medieval fury.

God bless:)

5/5 Ingrid

Brilliant write...
Intrepid these winds that swirl through the listless night,
On white marble clouds that coalesce in silence

^^ such powerful imagery... loved the silence of clouds :)

great word choice too :)
keep writing

Thank you, Cindy!

Randy
Excellent job on this piece. Wonderful imagery and word choices.
Take care Cindy

Thank you for all your comments. The night winds from the Atlantic and 'winds' of misfortune in my life inspired me to write this last year.