My good friend , the knife .

I thought i didn't need you .
i thought i was strong .
but when i saw you again today ,
it proved to be so wrong .

i held back my tears ,
and hid the hurt behind the smile .
what could i do when you were hers?
just look as a tear dropped onto the cement tile .

as you sat down in class ,
i asked you this , " are you truly happy with her?"
and as you were looking through the glass ,
you said , " no one else could make me happier."

i couldnt take it anymore ,
so i ran home and slammed the door .
the pain i felt was even worse than cutting myself ,
so i ransacked my bags and found my good friend , the knife .

i felt like there was nothing else to live for ,
so the 3 years we were together didn't mean anything anymore?
smiling as i saw my reflection through the knife ,
i pushed it hard against my soft skin and in it dived .

as i watched the blood flow like water ,
i thought to myself , did i still matter?
i took the drawing paper on my bed ,
and started to write a letter to you instead .

in it , it said " to the person who mattered once ,
and still do now , we were so happy as one .
were the feelings real , or were they just for fun?
i'll watch you from above , like all angels do .
and when you come to heaven one day , you'll see me too ."

make sure you keep the letter ,
as i painstakingly wrote it in blood .
for you to see the pain you left me with ,
and the pain that you didnt see within .

i'll tell God that the pain didn't matter ,
cos no matter how deep the knife went in ,
it still couldnt compare to the hurt you left me with .