The pain clenches my heart,
As I fall to the ground helplessly.
My knees give away and
I can't believe what I see.
I can't believe what I hear.
The slow breaths of air are silent,
The agonizing pain is gone.
And soon your spirit will reach heaven,
I know it won't be long.
I can't believe what I feel.
My body shakes uncontrollably,
I didn't get to whisper good-bye.
My heart is being ripped from my chest,
And everything is exploding inside.
I can't believe what I see.
You're laying in front of me,
Your blue eyes staring straight at me.
Your spirit has gone far away,
A painless world that you could see.
November 2, 2009 -- 10 months, 14 days, 10 and a half hours since you went to heaven, Dad. I love you, I miss you more than words describe. But we will meet again -- meet me halfway, open the gates of heaven for me when it's my time to go. Watch over me, take care of me and hold my hand through the struggles of life. Keep me safe in your arms. Remind me that you're always going to be there. And make sure that I don't forget the memories, because I'm never ready for them to fade. I can hear your laugh now... Your voice. I can see the twinkle in your eye as you laugh from one of your ridiculous jokes. All these memories are flooding back to me and I can't help but smile & cry at the same time knowing that I got the opportunity to have one of the best fathers in the world. I hope you're resting on one of those big fluffy clouds right now & I hope you're pain free. No more brain tumors, no more lung cancer... Just Free. You deserve to be free, you deserve to be happy. And I hope you are. We're OK down here, I promise we're OK down here. We know you wanted us to be happy and we are. You gave us this strength... and until the day I die, I will walk proud, happy and strong. Just the way you wanted me to.
