Just a thought

You have a smile upon your face
while I can't even look at my own.
Does that seem okay?
Am I still who I was before?
Being connected to you
has made me lose the beautiful
essence that brightens my soul.
The little tiny specks of
whatever made me, me
have vanished and left me
here..with a thought.

Why did you say those awful words
over and over and over again...
(I love you) NO!!

Have you no conscience?
No remorse for my feelings.
Lies are just words
until they leave your thoughts
and enter my heart..
where they become weapons.

But I'm just wondering
what made you want to hurt me?
Was it the gentle way I held your hand
or the simplicity in the letters I wrote?
Could it be the look in my
eyes whenever you were near
or how your voice made my words
tangle deep inside my throat.
I can't answer for myself
for I can't understand why.

These are just my thoughts but
could you explain to me
why it hurts so much
to be so numb?

*Just venting...
Lol I see I have a downvoter...lol you're so cool. Keep downvoting buddy :) *