The Perfume Tomb

I have leukemia and I'm going to die.
I guess like everyone I've always known,
But never in my scariest of dreams,
Could I have ever imagined it would be this soon.

My skin has become as pale
As the hospital sheets beneath me.
I have completely no energy anymore
And by mid afternoon
My eyes become to heavy to keep open.

I can't even begin to describe the pain
If death has a feeling this must be it.
My fiancee is my reason for fighting,
Promised her I would never leave
I can't give up, I've come to far to quit.

My bones feel as if their made of napalm.
Wish I could tell you I'm used to the pain by now,
But like a broken heart
This feeling you can't get used to.

By now I've accepted that I don't have long.
The thought of death doesn't bother me anymore,
Its the thought of never getting to see her again.
In most ways its killing me more than the cancer.

I try to think of the positives,
Their aren't many thats for sure.
The only thing I'm happy about it,
Is that I'm the sick one and not her.

Soon this hospital room
Will become my tomb.
I breathe her in, every inch of her,
The sweet aroma of her skin,
Mixed with perfume.

I'm struggling to keep my eyes open.
Tonight I'm afraid if I keep them closed for to long,
They'll never open again.
God before you call me home, please
Can you just give me five more minutes.
I'd like to say goodbye.

I want to tell her I'm sorry,
I fought as long and as hard as I could,
I just don't have the strength anymore.
I want her to know
I love her with all my heart.
That even though I died sick and in pain,
I died happy because of her.

I want to tell her not to cry,
It always hurt me so bad when she was upset.
To keep smiling, don't ever stop
Because I'll always be looking down from heaven
And you know that smile drives me crazy.

I always thought I'd have to die to see an angel.
I ended up living my life with one.
When I get to heaven it won't be anything new,
I've lived my entire life in heaven,
Because for my entire life
I've been in love with you.