I Wonder

I wonder sometimes,
If it's too difficult to have a family that really cares.
I've been standing alone and I'll keep on doing it,
But, I ask God to answer my prayers.

I found home outside the house,
And coming back here is a pain.
I'm sick of the constant drama,
Being here is a drain.

Image of a family shattered,
The perfect portrait splashed with black paint.
Everyone behaves like a victim,
But they're far from being saints.

A silent house echoed with bruises,
Pretending all is well is a great act.
Painful memories haunt every corner,
The concept of stability seems abstract.

I am a silent observer,
I stay far and I like it this way.
I've had my share of abuse,
The flashbacks make me shake.

So I wonder sometimes,
About this family portrait splashed with black paint.
They all behave like innocent victims,
But I know they are not saints.

*This is an extremely personal write. That's all I'm gonna say.