These are great lyrics If I had a dime for every time a lady said she'd be right back ..well you know.... this is priceless

The flow was definately back and forth in this piece and it dragged on a lot actually. I have no idea what you were trying to do with your rhyme scheme as it was all over the place. First stanza you had 2 lines rhyme back to back then at the end you rhymed go with go. Further down you rhymed a couple plural words with words that weren't plural which makes them not rhyme. I understand its a song but you need strong verses and you just didn't have them. I gave it a generous 4/5

Are we getting lost under street lamps
Where bugs crawl and shadows dance
As we drive on down this unknown road
Where pavement sags and lives erode
Do we need to get directions
Yes you needed to get afflictions

^^ Holy Cow I really loved this stanza!! So creative and detailed...i loved the bug part..i could totally picture a dark parking lot with lamps and those gross little bugs around it.

Has fear and strange made us blind
As we drive up to this blockade
Are we drawing our own chalk lines

^^ That was just awesome...drawing your own chalk lines..LOVED IT

At the beginning of the poem I didnt really know where this was going or if I honestly would like it...but i LOVED it
Job well done! 5/5

If i had a nickel everytime someone said that to me...Id be one rich mother.....yuh no.
I really did love this poem so i gave it a 5/5