Im beginning to recover from aphasia,
A quandary I had never foreseen.
Slowly but surly Im regaining my words,
However, my thoughts remain obscene.
Time can be poisonous,
Relentless and unforgiving.
Love, however, is lethal,
Its mark is never-ending.
I have done the unforgivable,
And discovered personal lows.
I am the epitome of all that is deplorable,
Deserving punishment only God or myself could bestow.
I acted and was decisive like a child,
When I could have been a man.
I lost everything I held sacred,
I guess thats where it all began.
I crippled a bond meant to be everlasting,
What else could I possibly say?
I have the same disdain for myself,
As you do everyday.
The mind is a horrible thing,
Rather it is wasted or not.
It manipulates and dilutes cognition,
It allows actions, which it knows, can never be forgot.
I am disgusted with myself,
Immersed in disbelief.
I lost lifes greatest treasure,
And now all thats left is grief.
I have no explanation,
Nothing can right what I have done.
My love for you is not the question.
My intelligence, however, could be one.
I understand there is no righting my wrongs,
No using my charisma to get away.
I did something I should have never done.
Nothing will ever make it ok.
Just know that I love you,
Know it wasnt malicious.
Id give anything to take it back,
My mind was just capricious.
