You don't smile the way you used to.
Your radiant glow has dissipated into nothing but a red face & a broken smile.
Your will to open the closet & to pull these fine clothes on and off your back has disappeared.
You replace the satin & silk with the cotton & polyester that hold onto the essence of him.
Your unconquerable soul quivers beneath the pounding waves of the need to see him smile again.
The throb in your heart at the site of a photo, a letter, a memory resurfacing, a lash out message...
You pull the strength from corners of your heart to let it go,
You let it slide under your nails & take the pain.
It sucks the life out of your eyes, reflecting the ghost you have become.
The draw full of reminders, you just can't find it in yourself to open just yet.
The wall full of him, you no longer see.
Though it stretches wall to wall, provoking you with its memories...
Inert & a moment captured in time, but still so dam alive.
You look beyond the rooted reminder that expands before you & drift far away.
Because the fact is you can not find the courage to take them down, to empty the drawer, to finally say goodbye.
But you'll get there.
I promise me.
