This was a powerful and striking piece, especially with that last line, it left me haunted. The emotion in this piece was alive and real and the descriptions you gave out really helped me understand this poem. A sad and mournful piece, your words still linger on my mind.

I would have liked to read more and more of this, it was that good!

My only suggestion would be to fix the punctuation. In some places it wasn't there and then you used periods where there should have been comma's and etc.

Keep writing my friend, you have talent!

God bless you and Merry Christmas!

~MaryAnne