Comments : Perfect

  • 15 years ago

    by Sylvia

    Corrine, when the people we love are no longer here, it does make holidays and other special events, less than perfect. This brought tears to my eyes when I read it because like you, Christmas will be less than perfect for me.

  • 15 years ago

    by TJ Arizona Eagle

    I don't have words to tell you the emotions this created. I hate this time of year for many reason. Brilliant job

  • 15 years ago

    by Em

    Wow, this is written beautifully but it quite emotional. I love your style. 5/5, Em

  • 15 years ago

    by Melissa

    What a touching piece of poetry, Corinne! Beautifully said. :)

  • 15 years ago

    by Ingrid

    Corinne,

    In between the lines I read about the pain and the tears, because no matter how imperfect our dear ones are or were..they were ours.

    I believe we should never strive for perfection, but strive to live out our potential, and try and reach the goals that matter to us, as individuals. Who cares about standard values..or truly wants to copy those perfect role models presented to us by the media? There is so much beauty in individuality..nothing more beautiful than a person who truly dares to be him/ herself.

    On a perfect Christmas
    There would be a
    Silent Night
    And that is what
    I have now

    ^^
    I know of this silence girl..it is deafening.

    Once again a meaningful poem by you!

    God bless and a Happy Christmas,

    5/5 Ingrid

  • 14 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    Anyone who passes away that we love, the holidays are truly a lot different with out them. It feels like a big chuck has been taken from our lives. I think most can relate to this..well done.

  • 14 years ago

    by Daisy if you do

    Corinne,
    This absolutely breaks my heart knowing what you have gone through this past year. It is always toughest around the holidays and through this pain has evoked a beautiful write even through the sadness and pain I know you felt why writing this. As always your poetry is absolutely beautiful and this is no exception. I wish you peace and comfort in the coming year.
    Love ya,
    Kay

  • 14 years ago

    by Lu

    Such a heart wrenching write Corinne.

    On a perfect Christmas
    There would be a
    Silent Night
    And that is what
    I have now

    But it seems
    Less than
    Perfect
    ^^^
    Your ending really gives the reader something to think about.

    Thanks for sharing this read, I can only imagine how many tears have been shed between the lines.

    ~hugs~

  • 14 years ago

    by Lonely Rider

    So beautifully penned...
    only if perfection was possible... and sometimes i wonder whether heaven is perfect or not ...

    //There would be a
    Silent Night
    And that is what
    I have now
    But it seems
    Less than
    Perfect
    //
    these lines were so touching... simply written but with so much depth ... the silence is no longer peaceful

    brilliant write it is...

  • 14 years ago

    by Faithless

    Wow this is a really sad poem. It must have been hard for you to celebrate Christmas without your love ones. It's funny how we complain too much about little things such as taking the train & bus just to meet our love ones but when they are gone, we actually miss doing the things that we hate. Well I guess those will just be your fond memories that you have of the one you lost. This poem is definitely a tearjerker. Excellent Job keep it up

  • 14 years ago

    by Cindy

    Corinne
    This really tore at my heart. The love you had for your mother can be felt in everyword you have penned. Funny how the holidays make us miss our loved ones that are gone all the more.
    ~hugs~
    Cindy

  • 14 years ago

    by Cindy

    Congrats on your win Corinne....very well deserved :)
    ~hugs~

  • 14 years ago

    by Ingrid

    Hey Corinne:)

    Congrats on the win, I think you deserved it.

    I realize, in retrospect, that my "Happy Christmas"wish was a little unthoughtful, considering your circumstances. I apologize, I had been writing so many comments, closing off with that very message, that I put it there automatically.

    God bless,

    Ingrid

  • 14 years ago

    by Lady Nik

    Congrats hun :) this was an amazing piece. Nik

  • 14 years ago

    by Lu

    Congrats on your win Corinne !
    Very deserving indeed

  • 14 years ago

    by AwingAshes

    The simplicity of this poem awes me.
    I understand you and your feelings.
    A most deserving win, by far.
    -AA
    Hare Krishna.

  • 14 years ago

    by Chicken Soup

    I laughed, cried and shit my pants. Simply less than perfect. 5/5

  • 14 years ago

    by Halston Mather

    This poem was VERY touching. I just had another "lonely" Christmas this past '09. My heart goes out to you, if you need anything we are all here for you. ALWAYS remember, after every dark night, there is a brighter day. =)

  • 10 years ago

    by Liam

    Understated and subtle, if I believed the rating system did anything other than place the undefinable in categories, I would doubtlessly give this work a "5". THIS, is what art is about, this poem exposes the absurd quality of the death of an elder, and death in general. It's such a clever emotional poem that it provoked me to sit for a few minutes after reading it and contemplate my own family situation and life/death in general. I think the poem is really literate in sharing the perspective of pre-mourning and mourning with such seamless transitions between the two. This really communicates with the reader in a way that aggressively grabs attention and provides you, the author, with this almost surreal illusion of omniscience. The common theme of elders in the family becoming taken for granted and seen as burdensome in their later years is so subtly juxtaposed with the great sadness and guilt of mourning that it has this trance-like quality because it almost exists in a reality without time, where the past, present, and future exist simultaneously. It amazes me that it feels so raw and descriptive with so few words, like a great comedian rhythmically and masterfully delivering an audience-igniting punch line to a one-liner.

    The poem focuses on what was your fully informed opinion of your mother before her passing, which is overwhelmingly dull and burdensome (as is common). The poem completely ignores any notion of a positive quality of your mother; yet her passing leaves you lost, disturbed, hurt, and profoundly depressed. It really speaks to me, it shows that something is truly lost in our relationship with our elders in their last years of exponentially decreasing independence, something that is so deeply implanted and so emotionally potent, that the full extent to which we perceive it's potency requires their complete nonexistence to reintroduce it to us.

    Truly and honestly a powerful and thought-provoking work that deserves whatever awards it received when you posted it.

    Thanks as always, Liam.