Rhetorical [ Rondeau]

by Michael D Nalley   Dec 24, 2009


Was a mortal man meant to die?
Or live forever in the sky?
If questions of our life we find
To be hard for a simple mind
Wonderful are the reasons why

Does God only exist on high?
Do demons fall while angels fly?
Is forbidden fruit for mankind?
Rhetorical?

Remember me as you pass by
While I am here where I must lie
Are we destined for ties that bind?
There's more to life than meets the eye
Rhetorical?

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Latest Comments

  • 14 years ago

    by xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex

    F.
    Never mind the Consistent part. I JUST realized it was a Rondeau. When using poetry forms, make sure the reader KNOWS the form, so as not to get confused or be harsh, in my case.
    I'm truly sorry.

    And as I've said before, repitition is important; when using a style that doesn't, or kind of doesn't, have a style, you need to make sure your words/sentences are strong enough to make the reader not think about the style; it also has to make SENSE when putting it in a certain style.

    I still didn't like it too much. Sorry again.

    xTheEcstasyofSuicidex

  • 14 years ago

    by xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex

    Oh.
    I have to say I disliked this poem to the fullest; it's your worst I've read, personally.

    Perhaps that's only my view, but I really disliked it. Here's why:

    The rhyming was cliche. Try to use unusual rhymes; not like "sky" and "eye".

    There isn't a single infliction in this; if you want the reader to FEEL what YOU'RE feeling, use spaces, the enter bar, ellipses (three periods), and punctuation.

    STAY CONSITENT on your style. In this poem it wasn't as bothersome as the last; it kind of worked for this poem, really. But, still, youv'e got to CATCH the reader's attention.

    Overall, I'd give it a two. I really disliked most of it; the ONLY thing I liked was the beginning stanza. It spoke and was true and use words nicely. The rest just. Well, I'm not going there.

    And I really didn't like the "Rhetorical?" parts. I don't know why; I usually enjoy repitition. But not here. Forgive me.

    I'm sorry.

    xTheEcastasyofSucidex -No Rate.-

  • 14 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    A thoughtful piece filled with brilliance, I enjoyed reading this write and it made me ponder your words and meaning. Thank you for the comment on my piece, it was good to hear from you!

    Hope you are enjoying the holidays, God bless!

    ~MaryAnne

  • 14 years ago

    by East Poetry

    I took a deep breath of delight after reading this poem. And then I read it again. You are definetly one if not THEE favorite poet of mine on this site.

    tell me another of your.

    you know I like the ones about deep spirituel stuff. Anything that has to do with the stars, or the beginning of time and existance.

    Got any??

    Eiether way tell me another of your poems that you want me to read.

    Read...

    like a fish that fight a reel

    of mine

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