They say when a heart breaks,
it heals stronger.
that's such a lie.
if strength is pushing away
any chance at happiness,
just to protect myself,
then my strength is my weakness.
I tend to forget
important things.
like names and places.
and names of places.
entire days are gone.
and the worst part?
it hardly matters.
no one notices
if I stumble on a thought
find forgotten places
or remember names I hate
or maybe no one cares?
I'm not sure.
but then I'm never sure
of myself
or anything.
I find it hard to trust
harder to be myself
god how I've changed.
even though I try to keep some things
the same
I remember silly things,
unimportant things.
if this is a healed heart
I need a security blanket
because I'll never make it
in the real world.
