There She Remains

by ilikepurple222   Jan 6, 2010


"I don't want you."
The words echoed through her
like a million knives.
She falls to the ground.

Bending her knees
into her body,
she lies on the cold, damp floor.
She's everything between weak and fragile.

Tears stream down her face,
leaving her eyes to sting.
They close,
and she wraps her arms
around the legs that had given out,
praying for it to be another nightmare.

There she remains.
Never moving,
never waking.
There I remain.

    report violation
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Latest Comments

  • 14 years ago

    by Stephanie Naylor

    I thought this was good but i also felt it was a little bit cliche. I mean there are lots of poems about lying and never waking up, and saying "she" and turning into "me". But the still some of the content of the poem was really good, and the flow was great. So i give it a 4/5

  • 14 years ago

    by Karl Wild GG23

    Definately fineshed strong with this piece it was right to the point and the flow was good. Its a sad and lonely thing to be unwanted especially by the people you want most. Great work 5/5

  • 14 years ago

    by Baby Rainbow

    That's really good. I like how you said she then said I at the end. xxx

  • 14 years ago

    by Cluadette

    I know how this feels... my question for you is are you describing rejection when your first asked out or after you've been in a relationship a long time....? its amazing though....

  • 14 years ago

    by iFallToPieces

    Wow, excellent poem, very deep and very touching.
    great job

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