Wow, I didn't expect a poem that I could relate so much to. I myself have an alcoholic 'father' and I know how it feels to witness it. The imagery was perfect; as reading I actually saw this man suffering with this disease, so to speak. But, I will agree with Lostlove1: look deeper. I cut my father off after my parents divorced (because of his alcoholic abusive ways) and I still dont talk to him. But, if I knew how, I would try to reach out to him.

Overall, beautifully written. I have actually read quite a few of your poems, and I must say that you have become one of my favorite poets on this here website.

Keep up the wonderful works.

5/5

--KJ

I think its so sad how people can have everything: money, a wife and kids and feel they need something more. I have no sympathy for people who do these things to themselves and their families. To me the pain is payback for all the hurt they caused and our still causing. Nicely done very heartfelt and true 5/5

I really, really enjoyed this - the last stanza seemed weaker than the others, think the last two sentences of it could be worded better :)

Great work though!

I really liked this poem deep.

This poem shows great emotion and a strong story, that i can relate to... altho he wasnt my dad, he was/is my moms bf now....

but i like this, it is a good write!!!
5/5 Always,
~Brittany~

On first reading of your poem my opinion is that is a reasonably allright poem. your experience is real and that comes across in your writing. however i feel that you are making a confession and you become slightly confused or lost as you write your poem. i think your poem the 'alcoholic' could be improved over time.

Very touching poem Chelsey. I can relate as I have seen many Uncles and Dad in this same poor state. Do not give up on him though, some people do change with prayer,faith, hope and Love.
Peace and Blessings

Big house, nice lawn, he's a hard working man
Hates the winter, craves the spring, enjoys his summer tan
He'll do anything to help others, that's just the way he is
Loved many woman, do anything for his 3 kids

- I liked how you opened this to describe what he used to be like before the drink, what his personality was like and how deeply he cared for his children. It shows people what that person was like and how much the drink can change them.

He has his priorities all wrong, now divorced and alone
His house echoes silence, he can't stand to be at home
He drowns himself in alcohol, his bottle always by his side
And everything has gotten worse since the day his mother died

- This describes so well the life of many alcoholics, how it begins and how they become so dependent on the drink that they always have something there right by their side. Once they get into this trap every little incident becomes a huge deal to them and they then take it as one more excuse to drink.

His eyes are always glossy, his words are always slurred
He'll raise his voice to whomever, to make sure that he's heard
He walks drunken and crooked, probably doesn't care if he falls
Thinks the world is out to get him, no one cares at all

- I really liked this stanza because you have got it spot on what they appear like. With their red eyes which often just stare right through you like nobody is inside them. The way they shout to be heard because like your last line says they soon become so wrapped up in themselves, they believe it is all about them. No one cares and is all against them, and this is often not true at all. IT shows the affects of alcohol on the mind and the paranoia and depression it creates.

He ruined his family, it's his fault no one's there
Blind to his own ignorance, now it can't be repaired
So the winters shall be dreary, and the summers oh so long
No matter the season or time, he'll sing the "poor me" song

- again I like how you point out it is all about them, this is what the drink does to them. I don't even think they are truly aware of the fact they do this. When they reach the bottom of the bottle and become so addicted all they care about is the drink and the release it gives them. Which is so sad because going back to your first stanza, this is obviously not what his personality was before.

He laughs at his sins, he practices them every day
He walks around not noticing his deceitful, evil ways
Recycle bin piled high, with hundreds of beer cans
My father, the alcoholic, he happens to be this man

- I think they become blind to their own actions in the end and ignore what it does to others, it just takes over their life and they just stand by and let it happen.

I relate to this very much and understand completely every word you are saying here. I live with an alcoholic and know all these feelings too well. IT is so sad when it someone who we were once so close to but the drink drives you apart in so many ways.

You created a very good flow and ryhme in this and still told the story without fault, so well done.

Enjoyed the read and wouldn't actually change anything in this poem. x

I can really relate to this, it really struck a cord. You are a beautiful writer.

Double post sorry.

Wow! I really liked it. Its creepy and realistic.