Beautiful :) "If I could turn each of my tears into anything,
It would be a solution to clear the eyes of others" great job. this was my favorite line.

Very well. Yeah, it might seem that we are blind with things but some people don't have the chance of others to show them the right way. Thats why our world is not perfect. We have things that go the right way and things that go the wrong way. thats what makes it to become life.

keep it up.
keep on writing.
love always and forever.

I had to get out the dictonary for this poem, what does piety mean, like the poem though nice choice of word selection. cant put in into anymore words really. great work

In the first seven lines, your rhyming went like this:
A,B,C,B.
A,B,A.

That's incosistent. And that 1.) Throws the read off and makes the poem unsettling and 2.) Tells the reader you weren't paying attention (even if you were). Throughout the rest of the poem, you keep to the A,B,A style, but if you're going to have an A,B,C,B style, you AT LEAST need to have another A,B,C,B style at the end, so it tyes together and the rhyming part makes sense; you want to appeal to your reader and by throwing them off, they're either confused or uninterested.

Republics are formed, for and by people
Who dream of a democratic society,
Separate, yet not independent of the steeple ^^^
"people" and "steeple" are forced. Not good.

Built by theological virtues and piety
Reality can be hell, but heaven will wait
For those that hope and believe
^^^
(I STRONGLY dislike this set of lines for the simple fact that the rhyming was so forced and ugly.)

But, by the end of the poem you picked it up again; I loved the ending - it made sense AND the rhyming was pretty.

I know you can write better than this.

xTheEcstasyofSuicidex. 4.5