by Shinobi Mar 7, 2010
category :
Sadness, depression /
about depression
Pieces of an unsolved puzzle laid to rest |
by PlasticSmile
I agree with Carl, you over-used a few words and you should try switching it around a bit to flow a little better. But all in all, I like this poem, it's deep and dark. 4/5 |
I liked the poem and the rhyme scheme for the most part, but I felt you over used words throughout your poem. You used eyes and tears severel times and it just kind of threw me off a bit. I'd switch some around to make this just a little better. Nice job though |