City Limits

by Lady Nik   Mar 23, 2010


The city looks so nice from here
floating in and out of view
I stand high on the roof deck
and fill my time with thoughts of you.

The lights look like paper stars
just close enough for me to reach.
I wish I could hold the language of the night
but like you it's something I can't keep.

The dusk creeps upon us slowly
when we are too busy laughing.
I wish time would be diastole for a moment
so I could take in what's happening.

The street becomes crowed with life
as we fade into the nothingness of sleep
I know I'm an imperfect being
but when dreaming of you perfection is achieved

The people invite me with a smile
and I know things won't be so timid.
I'm happy I arrived safely
just outside your heart's city limits.

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Latest Comments

  • 14 years ago

    by Shinobi

    The poem was good, until the last stanza. All the stanzas were very good, infact, the rhyming was nice, and the pictures you described there were very vivid. The last stanza didn't end with a rhyme, so the flow was off there. This poem is a case of a good start, but an imperfect end.
    I liked the concept of this poem, but it lacked something. Don't think it's such a big deal though 4/5

  • 14 years ago

    by Yakari Gabriel

    The street becomes crowed with life
    as we fade into the nothingness of sleep
    I know I'm an imperfect being
    but when dreaming of you perfection is achieved

    ^
    I liked that stanza best of all
    Nice flow
    Well done..
    Loved it hunny.

  • 14 years ago

    by Kuro

    D'awwww

    this was cute and i liked the metaphor at the end. nice job <3

  • 14 years ago

    by Dreamofolwin

    Aww.. this is wonderful! Loved the title and the theme. And how you ended this piece. Unique! Well done Lady Nik! :) Lol

  • 14 years ago

    by halfwaytoinvisible

    I have to agree with the above. Nice use of idea and the language that played around it.
    Keep up the work!

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