This one is probably my favorite out of all your poems because even though it doesnt have structured stanzas it makes perfect sense. good job!

I agree with brokeninside...this makes sense despite its unformed stanzas...u touch me in a weird way...and i am sure ur gna gain experience to rise over most of us here

5.5

Like what the other ppl said above me, you must work on your stanza structures. however, i really liked this piece! it was the deepest of all your poems in my opinion. may have been alittle out of place at times, but no matter, some of my poems are out of place too. i enjoyed reading your work, you have so much emotion built up it seems. do keep writing! you have potential, and you will learn and grow the more you write.

-Ashlei