Suicide letter

What is inside sadness?
hopelessness, despair?
or is it a word too short, or
too little to express a world
within

does it show in my eyes?
do you even care?
in the absence of words
i talk
but do you even listen?

but what is inside sadness?
is it emptyness, grief?
is it my failure to,
to make my goodbyes brief?

in my outward smiles,
do you see my heart weeps?
is it even important to,
whisper your joy away?

i am sad, for that is true?
for reasons i cannot disclose
for details smudge heavily in blue

my verses deny
what this intends
to begin brighter
from the darkness of
the end