A beautiful voice in expressing a loss. This lacks nothing. Strong cadence and eloquent phrasing. Another gem from you as always.

Far too many times we waste time not seeing what is in front of us (or beside us as the case may be) until it's too late. There is nothing more bittersweet than looking back on a love unexplored, misunderstood, or taken away too early when it's no longer in reach, for any reason.

One of the sweetest poems I read so far.
The imagery words you used helped to pass down the song like it was a story, but with a certain melody. You repeated one stanza, so I can refer to it as a lyrics actually, and consider the repeated stanza as a chorus.
The metaphors, rhymes, and words fitted perfectly. The poem flowed all the way through.

I guess I don't have anything to criticize about, nice work 5/5

I am speechless. Words do not escape me. A beautiful write from a talented soul. The rhyming was perfect and the wording just so meladic that it sang. I love the repeating of the stanza, so much power, so much grace. It is hard losing someone before you realize it. Essecially some one you love. 5/5
WakingFreedom

From time to time I guess, we all daydream , about what could have happen if we had just make that one step. From this poem I can see that you have lost someone whom you held so dear, someone whom you see as your soul mate. I guess fate wasn't o n your side and she depart before you could place a ring her finger. For that, now you could only daydream fore it's the only place that you could be with her. I truly enjoyed reading this. The flow is amazing:)

I really loved the repetative stanzas I thought that was great and made the poem really strong. Also the closing line was very powerful it ended it perfectly. I also really enjoyed the lines "she learned to love before she learned to dream" Amazing line...Great poem 5/5

"To forget about the times I let her out of my sight"--This felt vague and unsubstantial, and I was disappointed that it was part of the poem's refrain. That fact alone helps demonstrate the less-than-whole effort I sensed throughout the poem. For example:

"It seems in this old world there is never enough"--This felt used and, again, vague. The addition of "old" doesn't lend the line any freshness.

"though her heart's cold as ice"--Although you used the metaphor to mean a different thing than it normally does (implying death, I thought,) that doesn't prevent it from feeling powerfully cliche.

I liked the very last line much better than the rest of the poem. It had a tone to it that I would have liked to see throughout the rest.

I have to admit I'm being quite a bit more harsh than I would be for most users on the site, but it's because I know that you're an experienced writer and therefore that 1.) you can take the criticism, and 2.) you can do better. Some poems are better than others.

Sucha deep write,really shows the emotions,, long read but. Defently worth it, well done :)

Day dream lover...what an amazing title

ur 1st stanza is a very interesting opening, and the rhyming was realy strong and flowed well

I love to daydream to escape the darkness of night

>> waw yes how true...how sooo true.. i so love the mind u have !

To forget about the times I let her out of my sight
Eve of my dreams Oh beautiful Eve of my life
If dreams came true she would have been my wife

>>> she would have been...u knw they say saddest words of tongue or pen " it might/would/should...have been. BUT you know
sometimes the wind blows against the will of the ship...doesnt it :)..amazing stanza

I love to daydream to escape the darkness of night
To forget about the times I let her out of my sight
Eve of my dreams. Oh beautiful Eve of my life.
If dreams came true she would have been my wife...i love the repetition ...makes us like just be sure of how you feel. wise move ..i loved these lines...esp the truth that to forget we need 2 take off these ppl some times things away from our sight...2 avoid memories

Now I'm trapped in imagination ,while she's in paradise
Her soul's in heaven though her heart's cold as ice
I don't know if she would have it any other way
So I'll just sit here dreaming in the middle of the day

omg...gave me goosebumps..ur ending is pretty surprising..u never lead us where u wana..unless its ur closing stanza and i think thats very wise..esp that u give us excitation and joy///to figure out

Im really impressed by this poem...and i understood it completely so its my dearest of ur work for me..well done

5/5

Oh, my. This is gorgeous. It seems so heartfelt! Love is a tricky subject to write about, because it's hard to make it sound.. uncheesy. Haha. This doesn't seem cheesy at all, but rather quite lovely.

My favourite part of this piece are these lines:
"I read the poem she wrote with her low self-esteem
She learned to love before she learned to dream"

The second line there says so much, even though it is written simply and easy to understand. Wonderful.

One more thing - in the second stanza and in the fourth stanza, you use the line "Eve of my dreams. Oh beautiful Eve of my life." but I noticed that in the second stanza, there is no period after "Eve of my life" as there is in the fourth stanza. Just a small thing I noticed.

Overall, this piece is brilliant, to put it simply.

Five out of five. [5/5]

`Briana
(sorry for the delay!)

Nice poem!...I'm on to your next poem!lol
5/5