I seem to face a problem. An issue I can't solve. I am continuosly depressed and I can't find a person to rely on. This is harder then what I thought. I've tried various things but nothing seems to work out for me. My life had been deteriorated by my self. I cannot find a solution or a rrational idea. To how I might make this work. I cannot forgive for what he's made me as a person . And now he's had enough. I wanna be around him and I don't mind, but this is difficult to cope with and I'm so conffused. Like I wish I didn't feel such things. I wish my thoughts were good. But my life is not what I want. I need to male a desicion. I need to make a start. I need to get out of this hole I've put myself into. And I need to put it clear in my mind that he's not going to help me. That Rhys what u have friends for. I need some time. ..
