And so I sit here reading the same old stupid love quotes, only hoping to maybe make myself feel better or at least find a way to express how Im feeling. But it's not helping. There's no hope. I'm almost in tears and I cant understand why. I was fine 5 minutes ago,until I looked at the computer screen and saw that you were online. I miss you. I miss you more than words can even explain. All this time I've been trying to hide the truth. But I'm only lying to myself, and that hurts me more. The fact that I wish I didn't miss you, but I do. The fact that you're so disrespectful towards me, and I act like it doesn't even faze me. The fact that I pretend I don't love you, but in reality, you're the only one I've ever loved. And the fact that you've got me wrapped me around your little finger, when that's the last place I want to be. I'm lying again. The last place I want to be is where I am now, stuck missing you. Cause baby, missing you...well, it ain't easy. And you know what kills me the most? You take me for granted; you take my love for granted. You think you can play with my heart and then throw me off a cliff whenever you're tired of me. I don't want it to be like that. I want you to love me more than anything, but I guess trying to make someone fall in love with you is as pointless as trying to control who you fall in love with. And I certainly have absolutely no control over that, because if you haven't noticed, I don't want to love you anymore, but for some strange reason you're the only person I can love. The heart wants what the heart wants I guess. But that's why I'm confused. Does my heart want what you are, or what it wants you to be...? I guess I'm just a bipolar, love sick child.
