Please!

I stumbled across something today,
Something of yours.
It made me stop dead.

Its funny, right?
That I would use the word Dead,
Seeing as youre gone.

Im so angry at you,
Yet Im not all at the same time.
Im so confused,
I dont know what to do.

You helped me once,
I wish you could help me again.
Just like you used to.

Im never going to be the same,
Not since you left me.
Not the way you left me.
Never.

I could sit here and beg for you back,
But I know youre not coming home.
Not to me.

I have no control over this,
It hurts so badly.
Make it stop Nick,
Please!

I dont want to hurt any more.
Just take the pain away.
Ill soon loose control,
I cant hold on much longer.

*dedicated to nick otten. RIP.