...i wanna go for a drive into your mind, travel beyond your imagination. --
I'm barley holding myself above water, but I am finally falling back into my old routine, I am finally starting to believe in myself a little bit more. It seems I always write about love, maybe that's because its something that I want so badly in my life that it's constantly on my mind. I am holding myself above water barley, I am having my mind going a million miles an hour and it won't slow down, the brakes got blown out.
I wish I could be locked down from my own thoughts, I wish I could trap somebody else inside my mind for one minute - have them realize the things I think, the actions I hold myself back from. The words I can't quite get out yet, and how I see this world. It's beautiful because I make it beautiful inside my mind. We create this world, we create our own adventures, but Fate has something to do with everything. We learn our own lessons, because we know that nobody else can change us. We hold our heads up with confidence because we don't believe anything is wrong with us. We are just human, like everybody else.
I'm tired of defending myself to others and myself, especially myself. I don't have to have reasoning behind every action I do, everything I do. Why can't I just act on impulse, be spontaneous? Everybody expects talking, reasoning, thoughts behind an idea - what does that accomplish though. Having somebody else judge me, learning that what I can't do is nothing important to you, that its a "stupid idea", or "waste your time on something more productive". I'm tired of being the girl that talks so much she doesn't have time to think, I'm tired of having no filter inside my mind that I just talk and it doesn't stop.
I'm going to become this amazing person, this amazing women. I'm going to fall madly in love with somebody and live happily ever after. Until that day I'm here & I'm waiting for that one person, who will turn my world upside down, I want to stare at the stars for hours and wait for that one shooting star to send me over the edge.
