What Lies Beyond--Collab with - - Mysterious Charmer

by Sunshine   Aug 31, 2010


Light up the darkness of which within I lay
Forgiven not,yet destined to lose my way
Fearing the end as shivering lips turn blue
Running from the unknown; laying in front of you

Restrained by chains of shadow manipulation
Filling my ears with the latest fabrications
I've become a puppet stringed up by lies
Surrendering myself for the ultimate demise

For the dimness of a half memory jolted within
Controlling an untrue lifetime, unready to begin
Roving around a fatal end which I refuse to see
To surrender or not, lost within what's lost in me

A faded symphony replaces the beat of my core
As I tip the hourglass hoping time flows no more
So the unknown will never darken these skies
And I will remain blind to what lies beyond my eyes

****please leave his highness the same comment too

http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/dark/poems.php?id=1151860

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  • 14 years ago

    by Jad

    A really great collab first off is what I have to say. The way the poem so easily flowed and the words spoke to the reader is outstanding. The emotions also in this poem where pouring from line to line.

    "A faded symphony replaces the beat of my core
    As I tip the hourglass hoping time flows no more
    So the unknown will never darken these skies
    And I will remain blind to what lies beyond my eyes"

    So much sadness can be felt from this one part. It actually toke me awhile to decide which one I would add because the entire poem in itself was simply amazing. Good job and keep writing.

  • 14 years ago

    by PinkyPrincess

    Wow!! This poem is amazingggg! I absolutely LOVE it! I was deeply touched by both your words and I loved everything about it..
    The metaphors were perfectly written and I could even relate to parts of it.. It was dark yet beautiful!

    Great job - and I must say you both collaborated very well and should collaborate with more poetry!

    Well done!

  • 14 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    Very seamless collab, it was definitely a pleasure to this! You both did an excellent job. You went above & beyond what I was expecting! Well done.

  • 14 years ago

    by chind

    Oh my gosh! This was absolutely beautiful! I loved every bit of it, you strung your words together so amazingly, creating such a flawless piece ! The ending was very very strong. I loved it ! kudos to the both of you :D

  • 14 years ago

    by White Orchid

    This poem was dark but really good. You two collaborating was a good idea! Great Job! The whole thing was awesome. 5/5:)

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