Accepting Death

Jane, to begin with, the sadness portrayed within this poem is just too deep,
And what impresses me the most in here is that the use of simple language, it
Hit home for me, it truly did serve its purpose.

If I opened my heart to you
I would say, sweet angel,
I’m afraid too
…………..
I don’t believe there is in any other way, a better opener to such a piece,
To acknowledge the fear you or anyone would have from approaching death, it grabbed my attention fully.

I would greet your fear,
With a knowing smile
And a tear lingering
For your eyes alone
………………..
Trying to imagine the image within these lines in particular, it just too sad, it fits as a completion to the opening lines and it’s worded beautifully, just shows me how good of a poet you can be.

I would let the walls of
my great courage
come crashing down
so you might see the
trembling soul that's
inside of
me
…………..
You made it very easy for the reader to read your emotions, making it easy for them to grasp a better understanding of what you’re trying to portray, I honestly felt the sadness within these words.

I would grant you a
wistful goodbye,
but not before
your hand found a home
in mine
a final time.
……….
This is what hit home for me, these lines are full of emotions, and I couldn’t have thought of a better way to end the poem.
Jane, simply, this shows me how smart, and how good of a poet you are, the poem overall
Was too deep, full of emotions, well warded, and honestly, this is a winner in my book.
5/5 and I’m very impressed with it
God bless you.
Rabea =-)

The last line got me, each word of this was excellent and took the reader on a sorrowful journy but the last line drew it all together with a heart breaking sentiment.
Excellent

...hands-holding are the very Best hands...'-)

I do appreciate your journey here...

This was a very deep and moving poem. I also congratulate you on the contest that you did. Anyway I really liked the way you went about first arranging this poem as it gave the poem a good flow to it and as Nana said you had a good word choice which added to the depth in which you gave this poem. Also the emotions seem to pour out of your lines evoking a bit of sadness in ones heart as he/she reads the piece. Also there was some good imagery in this piece which gave a good picture to the reader.

"I would let the walls of
my great courage
come crashing down
so you might see the
trembling soul that's
inside of
me."

This verse was by far my favorite one as the simple language you use to describe something so deep and moving. I like the imagery in this verse as well as the meaning behind it. All in all I found this poem to be emotional in parts and also something a lot of people can relate to. Great job and keep writing.

Jane 1st off; congrats you have took both the judges liking with this poem . I personally found it the deepest and the clearest between the rest of the poems, for one particular reason. U used simple language , which where the trick lies when you want to touch someone.

If I opened my heart to you,
I would say, sweet angel,
I'm afraid too.
> I was in love with the opening lines, esp that you brought fear up. Was too soon, which is GOOD for some suspense

I would greet your fear
with a knowing smile,
^^this is just outstanding how
it completes the lines u opened the poem with.

and a tear lingering
for your eyes
alone.
^^Worded well, sad and imaginable!

I would let the walls of
my great courage
come crashing down
so you might see the
trembling soul that's
inside of
me.
^^honestly I had sigh over this part. REally poetic, and creative. Was emotional and bitter..and I couldn't help but feel the emotions you been penning

If I opened my heart to you,
I would stop my white lies
dead in their tracks.
^^I was not a gd fan of this part, but I loved the 3rd line, strong enough

I would grant you a
wistful goodbye,
but not before
your hand found a home
in mine
a final time.
^^^this is heart breaking.
excellent thoughts, perfect word choice
and the description is just beyond what I can praise..
WAs a very smart ending...a verrrrrrryyyyyyy touchy one..and YEs u did touch me deeply..

5/5 NO bet

If I opened my heart to you.( u would not believe me :P )