Her Last Words

by Raven   Dec 2, 2010


Tears rolled down my face
As everything is in place

The note which I plan to leave
Will allow me to believe

That everyone left here
Will no longer fear

That their hearts filled with hope
Even if my life was a downhill slope

Through the years no one could tell
Even if my screams sounded like bells

They can live on forever
And always be together

The knife clean and sharp
Only wish I had a heart

My wrists will have to do
Sad that theres only two

Things can go more quickly
But then things would be more ugly

The tub water has begun to fill
To this point I know the drill

Its the great beyond that scares me
Because I know not of what it will be

I will will no longer feel pain
Like when my friends said my name in vain

For they did not know I could hear
Yet they proved my biggest fear

They were never true friends of mine
Just people who were a waste of time

Its time for this to end
This knife is my only friend

I will forever be gone
Look west at dawn

The few smiles I had known
Will be there and shone

I love my few friends and family
Know that Im happy

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Latest Comments

  • 14 years ago

    by Bradley Peter

    Hello,

    I this poem was a mixture. There were up and downs. Some of the lines were fairly srong, like 'Even if my life was a downhill slope', and there were lines I felt had just been placed there for placement sake, like As I feel my turn around the bend'.

    I think this piece could've done will a little more strength behind the lines. Also, there were some points where the flow got a little stumbled, but as I say, there were a few strong lines.

    My favourite stanza was the forth one.

    Brad

    P.S.Please comment and vote honestly on every poem that you read.

    P.P.S. Thank you for your comments on my poems.

  • 14 years ago

    by Raven

    THANK YOU.... Random moment I felt I needed to write, and then this poem came.... where or how I do not know but I appreciate the comment very much!

  • 14 years ago

    by xxxGrimmxxx

    This is an amazing poem so filled with emotion

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