You really never noe what you got intol its gone

By the time yu get to read thiis ill probally be dead,but when you left in '99 a part of me went to heaven,I thank god at least I got to know what love really was but it hurt me to see what true love really does cuz even tho we never made love you were all that there was ,it was because I loved you so much that I had to make you leave,you made me doubt the way I thought you made me want to believe,and then I slipped up and let you get close to me,It was hard to not be openly when people spoke to me.this was not the way I thought my life was supposed to be,baby dont you see I had a blood transfusion that left me with HIV.i died a virgin I wish I couldve given myself to you .i cried in the hospital because there was no one else but you promise that youll meet me in paradise too.no matter what ill keep your love forever with me. te amo carino.