It was so nice to see you, to feel your chest under my head, your body next to me. I was happy, happier than i had been in so long. I smiled and laughed, things i felt i haven't done in so long. I sat there and listened to your family, and they made me feel so welcome. I wasn't intimidated by your mom, or your dad, they made me smile talking, telling me how they met. It made me want more than anything to be a part of that, made me miss my family. I had that, i use to be part of that instead i chose someone i thought i loved, silly madness that created. I wish some of the things didn't happen, but they did and i don't regret them, the timing in which they happened is what i regret. You made me thirst for love, to find what i have been missing, as for the rest of my life well i have to figure the rest on my own. All the signs point to the door, but finding it amongst the mess i made is the tricky part. I don't feel the same way for you as i did when we first got together, i care for you, and what happens but i don't love you, or hunger for you, as mean as it sounds you have become an annoying thing that has taken root in my life, and stolen the light out of everything that was beautiful. A weed i need to pull but then you have the most beautiful flowers, and i look in the mirror and see what a nasty weed i have become...all the life has been sucked out of me, and i have become miserable unhappy, depressed, i hate who i am when i am with you. I hate living this life, and i am so close to calling it quits. I don't want to have all good things taken away. I want to live, and be free...be who i was before you.
