Comments : Persistent Memories

  • 13 years ago

    by Jenna Bella Oldridge

    I think this poem seems finsihed even though you say it isn't. I liked the content of the poem and emotions expressed. For a short poem it said a lot and I liked reading it.

    5/5

  • 13 years ago

    by TSI25

    I have no need to copy and paste the individual stanzas to add length and reference what im referring, your poem was far from disjointed enough to allow me to do that at any rate. over all it was very well done, there is an emotion being conveyed here that i am reluctant to feel, not because it was poorly penned, but because im afraid to go there, the fact that you were able to take a pry to that little iron box inside is impressive beyond words, bravo.

    everything flowed beautifully, and you did not have the impression that it was necessary to adopt some inane rhyme scheme which was a breath of fresh air, free verse can, and in this case was, superbly beautiful and effective.

    moreover it was concise, there was nothing said except what was meant to be said, there was no side tracking, and there was no ramming the point home with repetition where it wasnt necessary, many people could learn from this piece.

    the only problem i had with it was the number of "large words" as nit picky as that sounds. i didn't get the impression that you were using big words to convey big emotions, but some might mistake that for the case. in this instance i think every word is justified, and well used.

    5/5 and again, bravo.

  • 13 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    I can feel the flow and meter . This poem demonstrates genius as according to a popular difinition