When...

When my thoughts no longer drift
upon a diamond sky..
my touch will linger on the softness of your bones

I adore that stanza, espesically the last line. I've been reading your poetry since you joined this site and it has improved dramatically. This piece brought tears to my eyes. It is so, so beautiful. You have an amazing soul.

The structure and lay out is lovely. The way you described this, the words you used, is a beautuful imaginary.

Brilliant = )

Danika
--xx--

Yaki I can't believe how much your writing has flourished in the last few weeks.
I absolutely love your new style.

You'll know why daisies bloom upon my tongue whenever I try to say that I love you.
^^
Love this ending, the word choices are wonderful and unique

Great read Yaki

When my words no longer speak of poetry but about roses that died on the surface of your soul

^ I thought this was incredible! such a burn, but beautifully describing a kind hearted person who no longer is...that was my favorite part!

You'll know why daisies bloom upon my tongue whenever I try to say that I love you.

^^ And this made me smile! I thought that was great personification!

I'd only suggest making your poem into stanzas to make it easier to read, other than that i loved it!

I love this Yak, the imagery, the feeling, it flowed nicely, great work, I really enjoyed reading it.