Chief Sitting Dog

Why did my master have to throw a fit
All I wanted was to take a wee sit
I should have been born an Irish setter
A Shih Tzu would have even be better

If I hadn't stopped to sit I would've caught the rabbit
I can't seem to help myself, it is a habit
I have a slight issue with my canine psyche
When I need relief he wants to take a hike

I would not trust him in the house without a muzzle
He thinks a box of corn flakes is jigsaw puzzle
I don't know why he just cannot understand
Going to the bathroom is a reasonable demand

When you have got to go you have got to go
A polar bear has to do it in the snow
I want to take care of business outside
He believes I am taking him for a ride

If a bean is bean then what is a pea?
I have to see a dog about a man you see
I'm not a fighter I'm just a lover
Who feels like farting under my cover