Charity

Beautifully penned. I love the imagery Mel. The word choice is great. Such a creative feel good piece. Definetly deserving of a win. Though I'd expect nothing less from you and your wonderful imagination!

Drifts like the remembrances of
a deeply felt dream..

Congrats on your win :)

I just love the idea of the title and how it relates to love- learning these three (faith hope and love) as virtues in my religion, I catch this sense that you are not alone and you are giving yourself wholly over to your lover, everything you are.

"I offered to you,
-all I had-"

I like how you opened this poem up, I felt this showed power and a great sense of wonder as you gave such enormous sacrifices, whether with time or love or just in respect and trust. I felt this could have also been added in the end, it just introduces so beautifully with that strike of passion showing you did it all.

"The lily nuzzled
behind my ear,
and a shriveled daisy chain
from a muddied wrist -"

Stunning imagery here, the use of a flower such as the lily nuzzling you and whispering all these fantasies, how you tied nature's glory and made it into awe and play.

"wrapped in a white dress
that once waft a torn hem
in April wind."

Love how the 'w's sound here, "waft" was a really neat choice and the flow is phenomenal here. I also like how you hinted at the season too and didn't add an article in that last line, which I find hard to do because sometimes you have to, wonderfully portrayed.

"and I stood within
all that was beautiful -"

Ohhh Mel! These lines were so mystic and had that majestic power to them! This encircles the reader with sweet charm that you are everything beautiful and around you emits that.

"terra cotta leaves
nibbling at my shoulders,
peach petals rustling
at clumsy feet,"

Lovely detail here, I like your definitions how you don't just use 'leaves'....nibbling was striking too, it is quite amazing to think nature is so alive, that you don't just 'feel' these breezes and witness them but go beyond that. "peach petals"- so childlike and free. going along with the next line.

"to find you plucking
prickles from my hair,
as you harvested wild flowers
to present me with"

I like your subtle use of alliteration throughout this piece- you chose the verbs so well though. "prickles" is a word I would not have used or quite frankly thought of- it gave more indirect meaning but showed a wider variety than just saying "thorns" or "remnants".

Those last two lines kind of reminded me of a servant and a princess getting ready to meet the queen- or some royal affair. How enchanting.

"-all you had, and
all we were to be-"

Love this reminisce, how you describe these days that felt like paradise and went as deep as two humans could possibly live.

I congratulate you greatly on your win and just contemplative imagery here that truly sets the scene in more wonderment than I could have conjured up!

Take care always and please write more :)

God bless you and Mary keep you!

What a breathtaking poem. I loved the insertion of terra cotta, it wasn't so long ago I was trying to write a poem with that word in it. (Failed) But, you have done a marvelous job using it and other unique little words that pack in the imagery in this piece. All the while you write with such mystique and charm. Weaving away at your words leaving readers in awe of your poetess. Awesome job, loved the write.

-Kay