You're Not There (Tonight)

You look me in the eyes.
My heart skips a beat.
I can't wait for you...

tonight.

I watch you.
You grab your bag and leave.
I missed you, but I still have

tonight.

You look so perfect on the way home.
We talk.
You confess, "I can't wait for

tonight."

Arriving.
I bathe in the warm waters of love and happiness.
Time is up, it's finally

tonight.

Here you are again.
Popping back and forth.
Why can't you be here all the time, not just

tonight?

I'm wrapped in your arms.
Invisible to everyone else.
But you hold me

tonight.

Then I turn to face you the next day.
I remember.
You're not there, not even

tonight.

*(Side note) I wrote this poem about a secret love of mine. He stays with me every night, every time I'm alone, and any time my head is clear of thoughts.
I know he knows me, he has since we were children. I try not to let the relationship inside of my head grow too much, but it's getting hard. I now have to face the reality that it isn't real... it's just a sick game that I play in my head and slowly ruin myself with.