This pain inside of me,
I swear it's tearing me apart,
it's getting harder just to survive
and to do it with a smile
when all I want to do is scream.
Sometimes wishing for a gaping hole
that would just let me slip on through,
every night when I go to bed
I pray and hope for simple things,
the only things I have left to beg for.
May I have the strength just to wake
and face another day,
not let myself or him down
and to just let me be with him,
the only prayers I keep anymore.
Much as I look around myself
and see the beauty and the joy
somehow I am unattached,
I feel somehow cold inside,
I don't know what to do.
This feeling of helpless exhaustion
as I feel myself running out of strength,
running out of hope,
never in us but in me,
I just keep focusing on one more day.
I know you're right when you say
we have no limits but what we give ourselves
but everyone has a breaking point
where they just can't handle anymore pain
and like a candle they burn out.
I can't tell if I feel so numb I'm cold
or if I'm so angry I want it all to burn,
twisted up in knots inside
it's driving me insane
and I can't fight back the tears.
