Im a junkie craving a fix,
but not of drugs.
the fix of disastrous pain.
a sharp blade to split my troubles as well as my skin.
a hot metal to burn my demons and caramelize all follicles.
i cry in grief when i must feel pain, i think im in a dream,
but its a real nightmare.
my demons are defeating me and ive given up.
i stare at the moon hoping it crashes into the earth.
i want to throw myself off a cliff, and for my wing to spiral me to my death.
the glitter of lights as i spiral into the foot of a lamp post.
the headlamps of vehicles suddenly brighten and crowds emerge to stare.
im blind im deaf, i finally feel nothing.
im dead, yet ive never felt so alive.
