I loved reading this poem until the last 2/3 lines. Those lines seemed a little forced and didnt seem to match the rest of the poem style. I did enjoy reading this though, i havnt seen alot of poems written in old style writting words so it was a pleasant suprise. Good write!

I will start off with the 'negatives' though that sounds way worse than it is: I think you could work on the flow a bit more, since the amount of syllables in each line seem to vary, which effects the reading. It is not as fluently as one may prefer but it is alright. That is the only thing in my opinion to complain about.

Now to the positives: Your rhymes were good and the length of this poem is good too, since it seems as if you said what you wanted to say without it seeming to be too detailed or too short. I also liked the story you told. I was able to imagine what the speaker was experiencing as i was reading, which is always a good thing. The imagery you set was quite interesting and i liked your choice of words.

Okay that's about it. Hope it helps and keep up writing :)

Awesome. What a delightful read.

Awesome. What a delightful read.