It's not me

Who is this person
this girl that keep following me
she's not me
am not sad all the time but she is
am not used to cry all the time but she can't stop
am not the one that give up in the first difficult step but she did
who is this?
is this painful girl me!
i just have this heavy heart
this confused lost part
i can't find my self
i can't give this situation a name
i don't want to believe it
cos she is not me
and she can never be
she is pessimist all the time
she can't fight for what she want
am not like this
i had never be
and i cant never be
do you think that's me
can i change so badly
can i leave all my happy spirit behind me
can i just turn my back to my friends
to my life
to my dreams
it's not me
and it can never be
but why i feel hurt every time she did some thing
why i feel sad every time she cry
every time she bleed
is this really me !!!!!!

( i don(t know if its a poem i just feel it so i write it )