The truth you'll never know

Losing control of my head and heart.... This is what happens when you say the things that make me wish I were your one and only and not someone you turn to when you don't know who you want.... I'm tired of this shit.... But damn me to Hades cause no matter how hard I try I can't force you out of my heart like I have all the others.....
You are my addiction and my poison, My lover and my torturer. The one that kills me with a smile on your face.... and you will never know how much I hate that I love you....