Well first of all, suicide notes do not need editing. hehe

As far as for this poem

The rhymes were ok
The rhythm was aff a bit, longs lines parring up with really short lines. (but I have that too)
The theme was good, an interesting one
the message was quite clear.
The emotions were very clear and to the point
Nice grammar

Overall, I like the poem.

David

loved it... hope u can pass by mine... read "destiny"(her suicide note) thanx =)

Awww.. This is so sad! I just had to read it whilst i WAS sad >:P lol
Anyway it was a great poem!!
Keep the great poems comin'!
<3 Steph xoxo