Left.

by MyaEve   Aug 8, 2011


Tears only last a lifetime,
While the pain lasts forever.
Broken hearts and broken smiles,
Something band aids cannot fix.

Only you can end this torture,
Your words,
Your smile,
Your LOVE.

Faded from my past,
No longer part of my future.
Bruising my heart,
Leaving without a trace.

Only you can help me,
Your words,
Your smile,
Your LOVE.

So where are you when I need you most?

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Latest Comments

  • 13 years ago

    by MyaEve

    Cynnie~I will fix it later, I have to clean my room lolz. Andd yeah that stanza is a little off, I'll fix it!
    Thank you so much! :3

    Tony~ Thank you much! (:

  • 13 years ago

    by Saerelune

    I already found the first line to be catchy because I had to think of the words "only" and "a lifetime" being put together, as they sound contradictory. Then you go on and say that pain lasts forever, and I am immediately remembered of something that's much deeper, for it must be something like an afterlife you're trying to indicate.

    Your flow is fine, except in your third stanza when it seems a bit off. Especially in this line:
    "The love you gave off; vanished."
    ^ I think it's because you put a pause in there. It would read better if you made one sentence that just runs on. Perhaps:
    "The love you gave off has vanished"
    But still the overall stanza doesn't sound right, and I think it would help if you tried to make use of the same line-length (amount of syllables) if you're going with a structure like this.

    I see you're trying to experiment with technique as well. :) I'm referring to the repetition of the second stanza. I liked its different structure, it's much more free and creates a contrast with the previous stanza.

    As for the poem's content, I know it can hurt that someone is not able to help you out, but know that the only one responsible of your happiness or sadness is yourself, for you know yourself best. :)

  • 13 years ago

    by The Poet Behind The Poems

    Beautiful writtin short but sweet :)

  • 13 years ago

    by Mostafa

    Anytime Myuh : 3

  • 13 years ago

    by MyaEve

    Thank you so much(:
    I really appreciate it :3