Stabbed my heart

You stabbed my heart,
with the sharpest knife you could find,
pulled it down with all your strength,
to tear it completely in half.

You left me bleeding on the floor,
leaving me to pick myself back up,
to arrange my heart back together
the best i could.

I saw that knife,
picked it up,
ran my fingers down the blade,
and put it against my skin,
cutting it ever so gently at first,
then putting pressure,
making the blood run down my arms,
two new cuts added to my collection.

Why do i allow you to do this,
you only hurt me,
you make me crave that knife,
crave the blood it releases,
you make me want to keep doing it,
cut myself until I'm numb,
till I'm close to death.

The blood hypnotizes me,
makes me want more,
i want to feel more pain,
i want to release it,
i grab that knife,
push it back against my skin,
and cut and cut till i can't anymore.

I loved you so much,
but you hurt me to the point,
i want that knife more then anything,
its become my best friend,
a thing i can turn to in my time of need,
it helps me calm down,
makes me feel better,
why do you do this to me.

You say you miss me,
you tell me you still love me,
then why did you,
stab my heart,
with the sharpest knife you could find,
pull it down with all your strength,
to tear it completely in half,
if you supposedly love me.