Oh wow, you have talent!!
The flow in this was brilliant, and the imagery was so vivid, I loved it!!
keep it up, I'll be sure to read some more
love Tara-Kay

"Had they only been moths drawn to little lights."

This was so original, I loved that line. It fit so many facets of life that it blew me away. Keep writing so we can keep enjoying

Connie

It's so nice to see some new people... and then when they can write, it's extra exciting! I think I'll need to read some of your other poems to get a better sense of your style, but I like what I see in this poem. I especially liked how you seemed to consciously control the pace; the longer, drawn out thoughts were highlighted well by the short lines like "So bright. / So tangible." It created a nice pause, and the overall effect of those lines was clear and refreshing. Well done.

This was by all means amazing...Good job. :)

Hmmm...so you like Aesop's Fables, eh? Can't think of one to match this poem, unless there's something about a moth getting burnt to death by an open flame, allured to its light? There was a good development of tone in this poem, and I think you have a knack for storytelling. I see some great potential in your writing- welcome to PnQ.