I'm still here

Drowning in the memories.
Caught up in the lies.
A down pour of depression,
Is bleeding out of my eyes.
Breaking point is shaddered,
The gun seems to call.
The room starts to spin,
And then I just fall.
My mind begins to haze.
My arms becoming numb.
Blood starting to pool.
That's it, I'm done.
But sadly I regain consciousness.
My mind is becoming clear.
I guess I didn't cut deep enough,
Because I'm still alive, I'm still here.