BreakDancer

by Sunshine   Sep 8, 2011


When you're with me you're nothing
less than a skilled break dancer
doing your moves inside my heart
where you run, whirl and hurl
silent emotions against my walls,
creatively, inevitably...without rules.

And I when with you, I'd be such
a harmonious audience
amazed with each beat you break
and each breath you take

from me,

unexpectedly opening a new door

for me

though within "me" is your dancing floor.

by: Rania Moallem

    report violation
0


Did You Like This Poem?

Latest Comments

  • 13 years ago

    by nouriguess

    Hey there you are inspired again, ha? ok I'll show you how to be inspired....AMAZING piece and maybe nominated I'll try to break some promises with some random members, lol....and yeah i wanted to say...mwa!

  • 13 years ago

    by Britt

    I feel the .'s spaced out the way they are, are a bit odd. It felt different to me, in a weird way lol. I understand PnQ doesn't let you space things the way you always want to or do any sort of formatting, though, so I understand. The breaks were definitely well placed, I think the emphasis on pausing, drawing out silence to get to the next lines were important and worked really well here.

    You've written more great images here :) I like the whirl and hurl, but not using 'twirl'. ;)

  • 13 years ago

    by believeinlove87

    I like this :).
    Using break dancing to describe the feelings yall feel :).
    Great Job <3
    5/5

Read All Comments (3)

More Poems By Sunshine