My Heart on Paper

I've been trying to get past this feeling, that's stopping me from letting you in.
And trust me it's not coming easy, cause I doubt you'll understand.
But I've been sitting here for hours, scrambling my thoughts until they're torn.
So on the off-chance that you'll care, this is how a heart pours...

I can't handle another breakdown, another let down, one more loss.
I wont go back to that place where you left me to rot.
Yes, I blame you for the damage that you've done.
And yes, I blame you for the person I've become.

But that's not all, you're the reason I don't sleep.
Why I fall apart every time I start to dream.
You've created my destruction, by now I bet that's clear.
But no need to worry, you'll never feel what I feel.

Let's see you collapse to the floor because the despair stops your heart.
Scream till you can't speak, lose yourself thanks to me.
Having every insecurity thrown back in your face.
But no one can know, only crash when you're alone.
Keep your mind off the pressure.rnDon't think about the pain.
Fake your little smile as a result of my little game.
FEEL WHAT I FEEL,
I'm praying that you do.
Because there's no way in hell that you'd ever make it through.

I'm not sure what else to say, but pages could still be filled.
I've written my heart on paper, just sitting in this room.
And if you wont admit to what you did,
I'm through explaining myself to you.